Big Blue


Today I had only one pair of clean summer height socks remaining in the stash. Of course they were the white - my forever neglected. I had two places to be this day, and though that last pair of emergency socks never ever feels like the right fit, I’ve been doing my due diligence with a fresh pair daily. I walked out my front door ready for my day and there it was - the torrential, diagonal downpour NY1 warned me about. As I popped open the big, Giants-blue umbrella I borrowed from my pal Greg last night, I realized my feet were doomed.


By the time I made it up to 14th street, those white socks had turned leathery tan accented with speckled black dots of city grit and my sneakers were as swampy as one of those Floridian alligator farms. I boarded the Avenue D crosstown bus heading East, and took a seat in the back. As I watched the beads of rain puddle around the tip of the upside down, big, Giants-blue umbrella, I remembered the second pair of socks and sneakers in my backpack for my second place to be today - a later day commercial audition. Hurrah, my feet would be dry, warm and cozy.


I exited the bus just East of 3rd Avenue and quickly ducked in to my first destination – my dermatologist’s office. See, I’ve been getting this little wart under my second-in-line toe – a tiny, little, big bitch wart. After the dermatologist scrapped the shit out of that needy wart and froze it to hell and back, I sat in the waiting room, smiling as I slid on those dry socks and those dry shoes. I noticed outside the rain let-up and the sun was peaking out. I was home-free …I thought. Suddenly a horrid, nails-against-the-chalkboard pain developed in my foot. I tried to walk, OUCH. My foot felt like it was on fire and all I wanted was to douse it with water to put out the flames.


As I hobbled with cleanched face to catch the Avenue D crosstown bus back West, my newly acquired limp relied heavily on my newly acquired big, Giants-blue cane.